Energy Vampires Really Do Exist - Protect Yourself
Learn to protect your own energy
I don't know if you are an energy vampire, sometimes people don't know that about themselves. I do know the first time I heard this term I was able to identify people in my life that could be classified as an energy vampire. These folks basically suck up all the air in a room.
An energy vampire steals all your good energy and doesn't give you anything in return for it. They are the takers of the world and they have no boundaries. The more you give, the more they take. You can bankrupt yourself emotionally, physically, and financially if you are caught up in a relationship (platonic or otherwise) with an energy vampire. I think perhaps the clinical term may be narcissist, but I have no clinical training to call anyone that. I also see that term everywhere, but I am not sure they are as common as we believe from Pinterest. It has become a term to describe an "ex" in a way people can relate. We all know at least one person in our lives that probably fits that description, but self-growth is more about managing yourself than others. That is the focus of this blog, so it's time for us to be honest with ourselves. It is time to create a new reality for ourselves. Trust me - I have been there and I am still trying to heal from this craziness.
In this post, I am going to discuss 3-very important components of protecting yourself from energy vampires. You are not going to wear garlic or whatever, but do what you have to do. Goal is to protect your energy. First thing is learn to love yourself. Second, Learn to value yourself. Finally, Demand that your relationships are mutually beneficial.
1. Self-Love is the foundation of all growth.
If you learn nothing else from reading this blog, then just know the foundation of all growth is self-love. I can't explain to you how to love yourself, but would you treat someone you love in a way that harms them? Would you make them feel bad about themselves? Would you say you're not enough? Can you imagine telling someone you love that they are a piece of shit? No. No normal human being thinks this is love. Some of us have been conditioned to believe that is all that we deserve, but it is not our natural state of being. If you are this person that continually is negative about yourself, guess who finds that attractive? The energy vampires. They can find the person in the room with the lowest amount of self-love. It doesn't matter if you have a high-paying job or tons of letters behind your name, they will find you. You will think it is love, and you will suffer needlessly as a result.
Don't convince yourself that you are "good energy" and that is why the energy vampires seek you out. It is the opposite actually. They are not looking to improve themselves, they are looking to sustain themselves. Think about it this way, when an animal hunts, they do not seek out the strong, vibrant, and healthy one in the pack. People who love themselves, radiate that love to other people. Healthy, strong, and vibrant people glow differently and attract the people that want to grow themselves. Sometimes you can't help being around energy vampires because they may be family members. In this case, you have to create boundaries that work for your personal situation. I'm not in favor of saying you should cut-off family members, but you know what is right for you. It may just mean you have to reduce the impact or create physical space. The more you commit to loving yourself, the less you will be around these people by the natural order of things.
What does self-love look like? It is different for everyone, but the fundamentals are all same. You have to respect yourself. Provide care for yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself. Just as you would love your child, you must also love yourself. There has to be discipline and you also have to hold yourself accountable for your own actions. If you find yourself allowing people to treat you poorly, then you are still stuck in old patterns. It takes time to make meaningful change. If you find yourself loving yourself too much (if there is a such a thing), then maybe you are being rude, mean, or selfish. There is a fine line, but I say do no harm, but take no shit. If you would give your friend the same advice about a situation, then it is probably the right advice for yourself as well.
2. Value yourself. Your time and energy are valuable. Your energy is currency.
You have to learn to value yourself and your time, as it is finite. Your energy, your time, your existence is on borrowed time. Don't give it away to energy vampires for free. This isn't so much about self love, it is about respecting your own energy. Guard it like it is everything, because it really is everything. In the end, your energy is really all you possess. The people that are happy and successful understand that their own energy is best INVESTED in growth and development. People may notice all your good qualities and tell you, the answer should be thank you. If someone wants to be in your life you need to ask (to yourself) what is in it for me? Is there a return on this time/energy investment?
See yourself as a somewhat of a spiritual bank. Your energy is your currency. Each minute of your time is worth $100, in a day you get $144,000. Everyone has the same currency value in this universe, but most people are not operating at this level. You can't operate at more than $100 level. An energy vampire definitely operates at a much lower frequency, but they can convince people that they are operating at a much higher level. In the end, like attracts like. You have to be honest with yourself about how much you value your own time and energy.
Would an energy bank loan this person energy? If someone walked in with $3 and was asking the bank for $97, without any way to repay the money, what would be the answer? You will continue to invite energy vampires into your life, until you increase your self-worth. Truth is they don't go to the bank asking for $97 because it would be too hard. They go to family and friends, looking to borrow from the person that will loan them a few dollars until payday. Just be aware, they don't have any real way to pay you back.
Bottom line: Don't let people borrow your good energy without charging them interest. It's called spiritual capitalism.
3. Mutually Beneficial Relationships.
The thing that I know for sure is that when you are around an energy vampire, the benefit is really for the other person. In any relationship, there should be some give and take. If you are constantly giving without receiving, it is unbalanced and unhealthy. Energy vampires will compliment you and tell you all your good traits. Can you say the same for them?
In his book, Life Strategies Dr. Phil says people do what works. If you were not getting some kind of a payoff from your actions, you wouldn't be doing it. Question then is what are you getting out of interacting with people that drain you of your energy? Do you feel smarter? Do you feel like you deserve to be treated poorly? Does it reaffirm your self-limiting belief system? This profoundly changed my perspective on life. Just this one thought. I stopped playing victim and I took accountability for allowing energy vampires into my life.
It's time to put on a garlic necklace and sage yourself. Do what needs to be done to become good energy. Help others, clear out old debts, meditate, and love people. Like I said, energy vampires aren't searching for the strong souls.
Cheers to your growth and mine.